George Clooney on Charlie Hebdo Attack: ‘We Have to Stand Up Together’

When a Hollywood Star takes a stronger stance against terrorism than Hollywood’s favorite President – who said he would unite and heal this nation, repair this nation’s reputation in the world’s eyes, save the planet, and stop the wars – Houston we have a serious P.R. problem.

Somewhere a fly heard one side of a phone conversation that went something like:

“Get me Obama’s agent. He needs to be canned. Wait. What? Obama’s not an actor with an agent?

Oh, George Clooney only seemed Presidential, not actually a President.

Obama is the President. I see.

But – but – but,

ah – alien lizard Illuminati Mason shape-shifting reptoid actor, Got it.
Still, He’s got to have an agent,
what?
Works free-lance does he? Acts as his own agent? Okay. Hmm. This all so very confusing.

Je Suis Charlie, what does that mean?”